Friday, July 25
Rin Tin Tin Activists
Perhaps you're unaware that several animal activists
hiss at Korea with their balled-up fists
due to their use of dogs for human consumption
as if they're sworn leaders against beastial corruption.
Brigitte Bardot, harshly attacked Koreans
for their reputation of being dog-eating human beings.
So, I suppose it's okay to stage bull-fights and rodeos
hog tying competitions, Tijuanan donkey shows*,
Hasn't the world westernized enough
without paying lip service to cheap activist fluff?
I think Mrs. Bardot needs to ease off her high horse
and allow other nations to route their course.
Concerning Korea, there are some general facts:
canines undergo worse humilating acts:
wearing latest and greatest in Barbie dog attire
drinking ginseng tainted spring water to their heart's design.
donning on slight hints of French perfumes
dyeing their damn ears---(smile, the poodle industry blooms)
Please tell Mrs. Bardot to focus on retirement,
on the French Med, or said pompous environment
Activists, point your fat finger within your realm
accuse your local infidels, and then take the helm.
* sorry, even I won't go into details here.
posted by sahr on 6:30 PM
Sunday, July 20
Once again Bush, and his faithful sidekick Blair,
defended their stance on the Iraq affair.
Toppling Sadaam without significant proof that an "Axis of Evil"
held horrifying biotoxins to smother millions of people.
Blair insisted that if a deaf ear was turned on the Middle East
chemical warfare manufacturing would have greatly increased.
Okay, my inference, granted, yet he still endures great criticism:
W.M.D.*, oil prospects, Bush kowtowing--that's a three sided prism!
Now let's not be so rash with the Chief Commanding Cowboy:
albeit you've never knew well he can employ
substantial skills onto the lonely dancefloor
with or without Brittney Spears--two thumbs and encore!!
The Texas Two Step, the Running Man, Moonwalk, the Cabbage Patch,
and a plethora of dance steps MC Hammer couldn't match.
Even if we clamor how he can ruthlessly burn down a town
but should a naysayer insist he can't throw down...
* Weapons of Mass Destruction
posted by sahr on 5:46 AM
Thursday, July 17
I'm Thirty, Now What?
When some fear the unknown in the work environment
Cockblockers feel it's their sound requirement
to act out the weakest of infantile theatrics
to justify the cause of the lowbrow tactics
simply because one couldn't make the click
they plan to rant and rave as a hapless lunatic.
Not all belligerents deserve a muzzle
Not all 'pieces' complete a corporate puzzle
Aside from the rant digest, tomorrow's my birthday
but I'm brainstorming at the moment of how to best convey
my upmost thanks to Jiwon Go, my first true friend in Seoul
who, for the last four months, played a compelling role,
providing a candle for my darkest days
when all else bestowed pity, she offered praise.
For all my talents I'm hopelessly tongue tied
scrambling for words to show I'm more than satisfied
to hold dear a just friend until the day I depart
I want the cyberworld to know of this precious sweetheart.
posted by sahr on 6:48 AM
Tuesday, July 8
To be Named
You're probably guessing I gave up the ghost
and this domain went without a host.
No, you're twice mistaken
Little you know what it took to awaken
the author from a pandaemonic nightmare
to my usual nightmare--it's a foreigner's affair.
Plus, friends and foes alike are relying on me
to provide the daily dirt--all spying on me.
Folks! I've weathered stormy days to partly sunny
with slight chances of rainbows as I earn my money.
Where shall I begin? The overzealous orangutang
at the local zoo or the fumes endured at the PC bang*
Exchanged my studio space for a two bedroom shack
soon to be shared with an obnoxious hunchback,
chainsmoking Christian by the tag of Harold.
(who's turning fifty soon). Can life be this cold?
My sweet talking director now presumed to quit
and us foreign teachers received not a word about it.
Did someone insist it's my turn to sob
Since it's my THIRD director at my SECOND job!!**
The Land of Morning Calm will prompt you to starting thinking:
how this "island nation" cocerced me to start drinking
*Personal Computer bang; bang means room
** I was in between jobs; kinda sorta
posted by sahr on 8:34 AM
Wednesday, June 11
Am I Too Young to Die from SARS?
Do you believe in fabricated diseases?
I do. Given that the latest press releases
insist there are few fatal signs
of SARS in youngsters. No determined borderlines.
I cram to understand why it's less of a threat
to kids but I'll willing to place my bet
that the virus is, in fact, a deliberate outbreak
to the general populace for bureaucratic sake.
No hard statistics in South Korea
but street kimchee spreads mild forms of diarrhea.
I'm still waiting on mad cow disease:
Quarantines on beef, never on cheese.
posted by sahr on 4:39 PM
Saturday, May 31
What's a Saturday night at the Club Havana
when its presence is cursed without a sultry Savanah?
I only find more reasons to have stayed in Seoul:
I've garnered more thrills with a remote control.
I just locked arms with an English chat club
in shallow harmony whilst looking pa nub
in the oddest of places where a young bloke
wants to take Dark and Lovely as a joke.
I love to play nonchalant, but if he tries to taunt me
and bull scare any dame that appears to want me,
I guess we may find ourselves at the preccint
since I'm not the one to play with a delinquent
posted by sahr on 9:05 AM
Sunday, May 18
So Many Headaches, so Little Time
First off, I'd like to settle two rumours
for all my vapid, online consumers:
I do not spin around in a late model Mazerati
nor am I zealous to start dating anybody
Why? I do not need a companion to make me feel "whole"
So stay tuned to Sex in the City and other TV swingers on patrol.
We've all "been there, done that", and we know the stakes
But in my humble case, girlfriends generate headaches.
Please input this value into your romance equations:
How often can you recall, in your long thread of relations,
substituting headache for the word girlfriend
long before you realized it was bound to end?
GIRLFRIEND = HEADACHE
HEADACHE = GIRLFRIEND
I have a headache this BIG.
Not tonight, darling, I have a headache.
What should I do about my girlfriend?
Al has a terrific girlfriend.
Whether you're depraved, deprived, Ellen Degenerates
You have a nagging headache on two legs, I send my regrets
Dump Love Potion # 9 and eightysix the wench.
Let another sucker from the sidelines swing
When the bases are all loaded, then bat like a king!
* yes, that was a deliberate misspelling!
posted by sahr on 9:06 AM